Like silver
"For you, O God, tested us;
you refined us like silver.
You brought us into prison
And laid burdens on our backs.
You let people ride over our heads;
we went through fire and water,
but you brought us to a place of abundance."
- Psalm 66: 10-12 NIV
Friends, we are now nearing the end of another year. 2018 is drawing to a close, and I can feel a chapter closing in a very real way. You know, recognizing the end of a calendar year is actually unusual for me. A combination of my late summer birthday and growing up in the North American educational system with its September-to-June rhythm has meant that my years have always begun and ended in August. Each year, the summer-to-fall transition meant I advanced a year in age and a grade in school. For me, New Year's Day has always been in August.
Not this year. 2018 was a year all by itself. It was the year I was engaged. It was the year I finished my postdoctoral position. As December closes, I feel the end of the year coming in a more real way than ever. The end of this year is the end of an era.
2018 tested me. This year was an absolute roller coaster with the highest highs and lowest lows I have experienced yet. In 2018, I felt like forged metal. Over and over again, I was smelted, boiled with nitric acid, and pounded on an anvil. I have been refined and shaped like silver.
In 2018, I saw the end of my scientific funding rapidly approaching, and I scrambled to write grant proposals and job applications to keep myself going. I experienced the panic of an uncertain professional future, and I did everything I could to keep up. But I got one major project funded, and in the end, I landed my dream job. I came out of the struggle funded and employed.
In 2018, my personal life was transformed. I became vulnerable in my relationships in a way I never had before. I revealed my true self to those who claim to love me, and in return, I received both stinging withdrawal and gracious acceptance. I experienced the glorious freedom that comes with telling the truth. I learned whom I can trust.
This year, I saw God in unexpected places. I traveled through icy wilderness and tropical paradise, and I visited past versions of myself. I married my best friend. I went through fire and water and was brought out to a place of abundance.
As 2018 draws to a close, I return from my grand Pacific adventure to the place that has become my long-term home. But I do not return the same as I was. 2019 will usher in a new era for me with a strong sense of permanence. The man I love has become my husband. I finally have a tenure-track position. We bought a house. All these things allow me to be more secure than ever before in my adult life, and I feel more in control of my own life than I have ever been. No longer a wanderer, I can explore the world from a position of security and strength. I have a solid base, a secure place I can return to, a true home.
I have been refined like silver, and with the new year comes a new era. 2019, I welcome you.
you refined us like silver.
You brought us into prison
And laid burdens on our backs.
You let people ride over our heads;
we went through fire and water,
but you brought us to a place of abundance."
- Psalm 66: 10-12 NIV
Friends, we are now nearing the end of another year. 2018 is drawing to a close, and I can feel a chapter closing in a very real way. You know, recognizing the end of a calendar year is actually unusual for me. A combination of my late summer birthday and growing up in the North American educational system with its September-to-June rhythm has meant that my years have always begun and ended in August. Each year, the summer-to-fall transition meant I advanced a year in age and a grade in school. For me, New Year's Day has always been in August.
Not this year. 2018 was a year all by itself. It was the year I was engaged. It was the year I finished my postdoctoral position. As December closes, I feel the end of the year coming in a more real way than ever. The end of this year is the end of an era.
2018 tested me. This year was an absolute roller coaster with the highest highs and lowest lows I have experienced yet. In 2018, I felt like forged metal. Over and over again, I was smelted, boiled with nitric acid, and pounded on an anvil. I have been refined and shaped like silver.
In 2018, I saw the end of my scientific funding rapidly approaching, and I scrambled to write grant proposals and job applications to keep myself going. I experienced the panic of an uncertain professional future, and I did everything I could to keep up. But I got one major project funded, and in the end, I landed my dream job. I came out of the struggle funded and employed.
In 2018, my personal life was transformed. I became vulnerable in my relationships in a way I never had before. I revealed my true self to those who claim to love me, and in return, I received both stinging withdrawal and gracious acceptance. I experienced the glorious freedom that comes with telling the truth. I learned whom I can trust.
This year, I saw God in unexpected places. I traveled through icy wilderness and tropical paradise, and I visited past versions of myself. I married my best friend. I went through fire and water and was brought out to a place of abundance.
As 2018 draws to a close, I return from my grand Pacific adventure to the place that has become my long-term home. But I do not return the same as I was. 2019 will usher in a new era for me with a strong sense of permanence. The man I love has become my husband. I finally have a tenure-track position. We bought a house. All these things allow me to be more secure than ever before in my adult life, and I feel more in control of my own life than I have ever been. No longer a wanderer, I can explore the world from a position of security and strength. I have a solid base, a secure place I can return to, a true home.
I have been refined like silver, and with the new year comes a new era. 2019, I welcome you.
Comments
Post a Comment